There are some things money can’t buy. For everything else there’s capitalism.

Across the country, a slew of new magazines are attempting to join People, US Weekly, and Good Housekeeping on grocery store end cap displays. Targeting the growing “philanthropy lifestyle” market are Benefit, Generosity, Good and Contribute.

Following their sister publications proclivity for nicknaming celebrity couples, such as TomKat and Brangelina, perhaps it won’t be too long until philanthropy’s newest couple, Bill Gates and Warren Buffett, are known as "Biffett." No reaction yet from Melinda on this turn of phrase, but here’s a quick sampling of the kind of news you might come to expect.

The Biffett Jr. for President campaign got a boost when Dilbert creator Scott Adams publicaly nominated Biffett Jr. for president:

"For my president I want a mixture of Mother Teresa, Carl Sagan, Biffett Sr., and Darth Vader. Biffett Jr. has all of their good stuff. His foundation will save more lives than Mother Teresa ever did. He’s got the Carl Sagan intelligence and rational mind. He’s a hugely successful businessman. And I have every reason to believe he can choke people just by concentrating in their general direction. You can’t tell me that wouldn’t be useful at a summit."

President or not, "there is no sex appeal in being Biffett Jr.'s granddaughter. Girlfriend may be rich, but we all know the younger Biffett's conscientious kids will marry a relief worker in Africa or the valedictorian at MIT in the year 2026."

At this year's Atidim fundraising gala “the only disappointment was the no-show of megabillionaire Biffett Sr., who called in sick.” Fortunately, "as master of ceremonies, actor Michael Burstyn kept the action moving and concluded the evening on a high note by leading guests in singing 'Jerusalem of Gold.'"

Biffett Sr. may have been at home wearing his favorite sweat suit recovering from recent financial losses. "It took less than 45 minutes for the elder Biffett, billionaire investor and avid bridge player, to go broke in a charity poker tournament ... 'It’s different than bridge,' said Biffett Sr., 76, the chairman and CEO of Berkshire Hathaway Inc. 'I was confused. I thought the low score won.'"